I can claim to renounce all that I want to yet nothing matters until I renounce the monster living inside - the EGO (That which has blurred my vision of the Self)

Atma nivedana is the highest renunciation. Yet me renouncing articles, Beings and circumstances helps me in my endeavors to live life of simplicity , purity and discipline which is required of any seeker in this journey.

Articles-

Meat-I have been trying to give up meat ever since I was a teenager. I would give up for a year and then start again( my attachment to Punjabi butter chicken). Though I did not consume significant meat at all, even when I ate it( once a month if that) but I wanted to be free of the desire and kept on failing. In 2015, after I returned from Bharat Yatra with Vivekji, uncannily the desire that plagued me for decades was gone!! Mentally I had finally given up. I’m so happy that this grace happened.

Beings-

Ghosts from past-Attachments to certain people from past,had persisted despite years of separation. It caused pangs of agony sometimes. Thanks to the great opportunity to introspect and reflect during the Silence retreat, I finally forgave myself and them. What remains now is love.

Circumstances-

Pessimism. I used to look at the dark side of everything. Sometimes I had fatalistic attitude towards life. My writings were very dark too; I loved to brood negatively on all that I perceived to be missing from my life. Life seemed to be traveling on a long ride on a melancholy train. Not any more!

Outwardly, everything may still look the same, but I have learnt to renounce pessimism. Thanks to Vedanta I feel positive, grateful, blessed with all that has been given to me. Sthaaney- all is a it is supposed to be.

I feel much more loving towards people I come across, I’m more cheerful and half the time, I don’t even know what I’m smiling about; a secret conversation between Him and i or a joke between I and i. Who knows!

What I want to renounce and trying-

• Anger
• Judgement
• Jealousy/comparison
• Pride/arrogance
• All Attachments with people in my present
• Expectations
• Cycle of doer-ship-deserver-ship……
• And the list is long!!!

There is lot to renounce. More than the articles I need to renounce the vices within me; that will automatically reduce my dependence on ABC’s.

One day, only with Bhagvan‘s and Guru’s grace, I hope to renounce Ego.

Lose your life if you seek eternity.~ Rumi